I need to escape from here.
It has been ten days since I had been rescued by this madman after falling off the cliff, and is now slowly recovering in a cave. My arms were completely paralyzed and my left foot was broken. The only body part with any mobility left was my right leg. It wasn’t impossible for me to recuperate at the bottom of the valley, but hiding in a cave was a better option than being discovered by those righteous cultivators who were hunting me down. If I were to be caught by them, then there really will be no chance of survival.
But … my savior was a lunatic with severe mental illnesses. If I don’t run away soon, I think I will go crazy with him.
Speaking of him, a noise at the mouth of the cave was heard, tossing my nerves into a jumbled mess. The maniac was back!
The sun was shining brightly outside, while the cave was cool. The light emitted from the entrance was enough for me to make out the man who walked into the cave.
He was a very tall man, dressed in straw and animal weaved clothing. His hair was disheveled like a bunch of weeds. His facial features were obstructed by his equally messy beard, only a pair of bright phoenix eyes could be seen through the thick beard.
I took a glance at the prey he had thrown from his shoulder onto the ground. It was a fat stag.
“Brother, you are so talented, being able to hunt such a big deer,” I wanted to ﬂatter him a bit more, but the other party impatiently strided over and tore off my clothing. Completely ignoring my injuries, he pushed open my legs and pulled out his big guy.
I had reached the worst of luck: not only to break both the hand
and foot, but to also meet a lunatic, a lunatic that likes to use the backdoor and couldn’t tell a man from a woman, and then be humiliated by the said bastard.
“You…… Ah……. Don’t……. It hurts!” The man had absolutely no control. Every time he entered, it felt like he was trying to nail me to the ground.
Both of my hands were weak, and I could only move one leg, so I could only try to kick him away from me with that same leg.
“NanNan, be good. Birth me some children” He seemed to see through my intentions, and immediately held down my leg, pushing it to the side, and started to pump into me even more vigorously.
“Ah ah!” All of a sudden, my legs had gone soft, no longer having the strength to put up a struggle.
Who wants to give you a baby?! Open up your fucking eyes, this Grandpa, I, am a MAN! A man with a dick! (The grandpa is referring to our narrator)
But I can only say these words in my heart, because as soon as I open my mouth, I was left embarrassed by the shameful moans I had unconsciously let out.
“Get pregnant … want children…” the madman spoke in a strange, hoarse voice, sounding as if he had not spoken for many years, while mounting me, thrusting wildly like a dog in heat.
“Don’t…” I shook my head powerlessly, my long hair had became damp with sweat. Gradually, even during such crazed intercourse, the painful sensation had subsided, and was replaced by pleasure. I couldn’t help but gasp heavily, trying to block the screams that were trying to burst from my throat.
From the very day I woke up, I was fucked like a woman by this psychopath.
I don’t know whether he had mistaken me as a woman or if his mind was so damaged that he has forgotten that a man couldn’t give birth. Each day, he was either hunting for food or fucking me in the cave. And every time, he will say a phrase or two, such as “give me a child,” or “this time, you will deﬁnitely bear a child.”
If I can recover, even if only to 40%, no, even to 30% of my power, the ﬁrst thing I will do is to castrate him. Otherwise, I would not be able to vent my hatred.
At last, the man ﬁnally stopped after a heavy thrust, and I felt a warm liquid being injected into my body, causing it to spasm.
The uncomfortable tension in my body made me very miserable and pained, and was ﬁnally let out with a painful, but refreshing croon, which had sounded to me, very pitiful.
(I really did not know how to translate this sentence: 本就伤痕累累， 身体不可抑制的紧绷让我非常痛苦，终于发出了又痛苦又舒爽的低吟， 听起来甚至有些让我不愿承认的……惹人怜惜。)
“Be good. Have a baby….” The madman attempted to kiss my face which I avoided with disgust. Who knew how long the man had gone without shaving. His beard was all long and prickly.
“You deranged person! I am a MAN! I can not have children!” I don’t know how many times I have told him that, but they were all spoken in vain.
I moved my lower body and found that he was still in me. I grind my teeth in anger and was tempted to bite off his teeth then and there.
“Get out!” I grit my teeth.
He seemed to understand this sentence, but did not get up.
Instead, he pressed closer against me, causing my wounds to hurt.
“It’s ﬂowing out… not pregnant.”
Fuck your mom! This one of course can not get pregnant. You can try for a thousand times and I still won’t get pregnant.
Closing my eyes, I endured my anger and gritted out, “I’m hungry, hungry… about to starve to death.”
He listened to what I said and slowly pulled out. With dry grass, he proceeded to clean me up. After helping me get dressed, he got to the cave entrance and prepared the stag for our meal.
I can’t do this anymore. I have to ﬁgure out a way to deal with this lunatic. But, I can’t deal with him using ordinary means.
I glanced towards the cave entrance, the madman was topless, showing off his bulging muscles as he smashed the fat deer with a stone axe, causing blood to splatter onto his face, making the man look gruesome.
My sight slowly retracted and fell onto my own stomach, where it very ﬁrm and tight and still uniformly ﬂat….
The next day, when the maniac wanted to press against me again, I suddenly turned my face to the side and dry heaved.
If I can’t fool this half-stupid idiot, then I, Han QinYan, had really wasted these twenty years of living.
By the time I “give birth” in ten months, I’m afraid I would already had recovered, and then….
I will be leering at the madman’s surprised expression, then ﬂaying him alive and having him quartered.
“Get up and eat.”
In the morning, before I was completely awake, my mouth was stuffed with several sweet and sour wild fruits, which were all very delicious.
He did not give me enough time to swallow the ﬁrst piece of fruit before continuingly shoving more into my mouth, causing me to turn my head aside and mumbled, “Slow down, can’t you see that I can’t eat anymore.”
Since I became “pregnant,” my life had been a lot better off, well at least, the lunatic won’t try to get me pregnant with his seed anymore. However, this farce made my heart suffer- being treated as a woman is shameful enough, but I also have to sink so low to fake a pregnancy with this maniac.
My heart clenched in pain as I tried moving my left leg, which was tightly tied to a branch. Not yet… just a bit longer, then I will be able to stand up on this leg. Then, I can get out of the cave and scout for
a way to escape.
Suddenly the maniac grabbed my jaw, and using some mysterious technique, he jabbed two ﬁngers at my throat, causing the food to be swallowed. Afterwards, he continued to stuff wild fruit in my mouth, watching my chew and swallow, then repeating his actions over and over again.
The man also knew martial arts, and I’m afraid his apitude was not low. Maybe the reason why he turned crazy was because his training had backﬁred. After discovering this fact, my need to recuperate and ﬂee became all the more imminent. “Darling, be good.” The man looked happy, stroking my head, and even wiping the fruit juice off the corner of my mouth with his thumb.
I frowned, “Don’t call me darling…. My name is Han Qing Yan.”
The man smiled at me, seemingly understanding what I had said,
“Han QingYan!” “Darling!”
“Han! Qin! Yan!” “Darling!”
“…” I rolled my eyes at him, giving up. Why was I wasting my energy dealing with a lunatic. He can call me whatever he wants.
I shut my mouth and stopped trying to correct him. The man seemed to notice my displeasure and handed me another fruit. But this time I didn’t open my mouth. I was already full and didn’t want to eat it.
“Eat, the child grows… quick.” He forced the fruit into my mouth.
The action caused an unknown ﬁre to spark in my heart, resulting in me using my good leg to kick him, “Child, child, child! All you think about is the child!”
He held down my leg and his eyes instantly held a cold look, “No… move, hurting the child.” I tensed up and didn’t dare to move, afraid that he’ll break my leg.
This demented person is truly sick and bipolar. This great one is giving birth to his child, and he’s treating me so harshly. So unappreciative.
I chewed my lips and suddenly placed on a painful expression, “I… My stomach hurts.”
“Ah!” Panicked, he loosened my legs and rushed over to see what was happening.
My body was littered with injuries and scars, leaving him clueless on what to do. He resulted to carefully caressing my stomach, telling the non-existent child to “be good and don’t cause any trouble.”
“It’s all because of you upsetting me that I disturbed the fetus’ peace (动了胎气). I, Han Qing Yan, am a person who can both bow and submit and stand tall (idiom: means that
he’s adaptable to situations). Since there was not a third
person in this room, there is no shame in me pretending to be a pregnant woman to save my own skin. (动了胎气: I have no idea how to translate this; here’s my take on the explanation: basically “ 胎气” is a traditional Chinese medicinal
concept alluding to the fetus, and “动了胎气” happens when the
mom is really angry and stressed, which is not good for the growing baby. So technically 动了胎气 means that Han Qing Yan could had “miscarried.” COULD HAD.)
The man carefully, as if he was afraid to break me, “Darling, don’t be angry,” bowed his head down and kissed my belly softly.
I felt creeped out by his actions “Hey, don’t always keep touching my stomach. What if you damaged it?”
As expected, the man jolted up and got as far as he can away from me, not daring to touch my stomach.
In the evening, he brought back a ﬁsh, something that he rarely does. The skin was crispy, and the meat was extremely tender. Not afraid of being burned, the man broke the meat off into pieces with his hands and fed them to me. Soon after, a majority of the ﬁsh had entered my stomach, leaving only the head, tail, and the thorny back.
After assuring that I was full, he went to the cave entrance and wolfed down the remains of the ﬁsh.
The fruits the maniac had given me this morning grew on tall branches which were full of barbs. The wounds on his hands had grown more and more abundant, and the even fruits had started to taste like his blood.
If he had not been so brainsick, or if only he had not treated me like a woman, I would had taken him out of this hellhole when I recovered as a thanks for taking such attentive and extensive care of
me. But, it’s just a pity…
I took my eyes off him and closed them slowly. Pity my ass.
I don’t know how long I’ve slept, but I was awakened by a strange feeling between my legs. When I came through, I saw that the lunatic had taken off my pants and was spreading my legs apart.
Fucking hell. I’m pregnant and you still won’t leave me alone! Furious, I wanted to kick my leg out again, but resisted the urge,
and instead pretended to be scared, “It’ll… it’ll hurt the child!”
The man cares about the child more than anything else, so he’ll deﬁnitely have to stop.
Who knew that the man just continued parting my legs and pulled out his tool, squeezing it into the space between my legs and began to rub. “No… go in… don’t be afraid darling.”
If there was a mirror, one can see my face turn black with anger as I felt the heat move between my legs.
Fuck you, you horny son of a bitch. Can’t even hold it off for one day? Was it because he had been stuck in the gorge for so long?
The author had some idioms and concepts that didn’t have an English translation, but hopefully everything still makes sense.
It got gradually hotter and hotter as the days passed.
Although the cave was cool, there will still be the occasional one or two gushes of hot wind blowing in. My skin was sticky with sweat, but unfortunately I couldn’t move, so I had to endure the discomfort.
When the Psycho ﬁnally returned at noon, I immediately expressed my desire to bathe.
“I’ll stink if I don’t bathe soon.”
It had been about half a month since I fell from the cliff, and the tattered clothes I wore were stained with dirt and blood. It was beyond the limit I could tolerate anymore.
After hearing me say that, the Psycho crawled over to my side, and like a big wolf dog, started to sniff around my ears and neck. In a blunt tone, he stated, “Doesn’t stink.”
I found it diﬃcult to avoid his sniﬃng, and didn’t know how to respond, except to laugh, “Did your nose get scratched by a bear?”
Seeing me laughing, he started to laugh like a fool, ignoring what I had just asked.
“Stop laughing and take me to a bath!” I urged him.
I know for a fact there was a small stream or pond near this place because every two days, the Psycho would carry a giant stone pot out and ﬁll it to the brim with water. The stone pot had to be at least a thousand jin, and to see him carrying it with ease was scarily amazing.
(jin= ½ kilogram)
He got up and looked down at me for a moment, as if thinking about how he’ll move my immobile body out.
“You turn around and crouch down, I ah-” Before I had ﬁnished speaking, he stooped down and picked me up by the waist.
He held me steadily and ﬁrmly, not allowing me to feel any bumby movements as he carried me out, but at the same time, his actions were very gentle. Throughout the whole journey he was extremely attentive to my injuries, taking care not to make sudden movements.
This was the ﬁrst time I had been outside the cave ever since I woke up, and it would be a lie to say that I was not excited. But currently, I was crippled and had to rely on the Psycho to move, causing me to have to restrain my excitement.
After walking for about the time it takes to burn one incense stick, I ﬁnally heard the sound of water ﬂowing. As the sounds got louder, the stream slowly appeared in front of me.
(The author used 一炷香的时间 (the time it takes to burn one incense stick), and to my best understanding that’s 30 minutes.)
The stream was about 3-chi wide. I could not see where the stream ﬂowed from or where it ﬂowed it. It just trickled steadily through the quiet forest.
(1 chi= 1 foot)
Originally, I had wanted him to take my clothes off and wash them in the stream. Even if he couldn’t clean them thoroughly, he’d at least have to smooth out my tangled hair. Who knew the Psycho would place a large leaf on the ground in front of a huge stone next to the stream and leaned me on the stone. Without a word, he stripped me and jumped into the knee-deep creek.
I leaned against the stone, completely naked, blinking and wondering if he had misunderstood me.
Don’t tell me this Psycho can’t even tell the difference between bathing and washing the clothes?!!
Fortunately, I didn’t need to be angry for a long as the Psycho emerged onto the shore, holding onto all my wet belongings.
To came over, and touched my face with his big hands. Then he started to wipe my body with my wet innershirt.
The stream’s water was cold, not at all affected by the hot weather. Unable to control myself, I let out a sneeze.
He stopped immediately, “Cold?”
I shook my head, “Not cold, it’s very comfortable.”
He grinned at me, ﬂashing two rows of pearly white teeth.
The innershirt was very soft, and using it to wipe the body was exceptionally comfortable, but it was not as enjoyable as directly washing in the water.
I frowned and asked him, “Why don’t you just place me directly in the water?”
His hands paused, and then breathed out 5 words, “Water is cold, stomach-ache.”
(The words were “水冷，肚子疼”)
Oh, I almost forgot that I was a fragile “pregnant” wife.
Patiently, I reasoned him, “Then what about my hair? If I don’t wash it, it’ll get even more tangled. I’m not that…. The child is not that delicate. Just let me was for a little while. My stomach won’t hurt.”
He stared at me for a long time and didn’t speak. My heart thumped nervously as he continued his intense staredown. His eyes revealed nothing of what he was thinking about, causing me to be unable to predict what will happen next.
Finally, he stood up.
“Darling, wait for me.” He covered my stomach with my clothes and left without a word.
I was completely lost on what he was going to do, “Hey! Where are you going? Hey! Wait!”
I couldn’t move any part of my body except for my right leg and my head, so I just sat by the stone, waiting. The sun was blazing down, but thankfully, it was facing the back of the stone, otherwise I would had fainted from heat stroke.
I don’t know how much time had passed, but then I heard slight footsteps from behind, causing me to be immediately alert, “Who?”
The footsteps got closer and ﬁnally stopped in front of me. Seeing that it was Psycho, I relaxed my panicked heart.
“Darling!” He smiled and placed the item he held on the ground, reaching over to wipe the nonexistent sweat off my forehead.
I avoided the action and looked at the object on the ground, noticing that it was a small wooden basin.
“You went to make this?”
Although the basin was small, but the craftsmanship was spectacular. It already takes a great deal of skill to craft a basin in this forest that was stuck in the middle of nowhere. However, he even managed to smooth out the walls and bottom of the basin. His internal force is incredibly scary.
I studied the Psycho carefully, wondering which mountain god is this person. How come I have never heard of such person in Jianghu before.
He stroked my cheek with the back of his hand, “Darling, wait… soon… you can wash.” Then he went to the stream with the wooden basin.
Lately he had been able to talk to me more and more smoothly. Just a bit longer, he may be able to speak ﬂuently without any problems.
After a while, he returned, water splashing out of the basin as he walked towards me.
I couldn’t move, so of course, he had to wash my hair. But my hair was tightly knotted with blood and dirt. It could not be untangled for a long time.
“You can just cut oﬀ the tangled stands,” I told the Psycho,
“Otherwise it’ll take too long to unknot everything.”
He pretended to not hear what I had said, and patiently washed my hair. Everytime he encountered a knot, he carefully undid it, with more seriousness than a woman doing needlework.
It was really warm and with the comfortable and gentle pulling of my hair, I unknowingly fell asleep. When I woke up, my hair was already half-dried.
I opened my eyes, but my eyesight was still blurry. There was a moving shadow in front of me. With great effort, I glanced up on the rock, where there stood a person. From my point of view, I had a clear view of the large member that underneath that animal hide. Looking at it made my eyes hurt and my neck sore. He seemed to have sensed that I was awake and jumped down from the rock carrying my now dried clothes.
He really is a carefree lunatic…
It was probably due to the bath that I was in a relaxed and refreshed mood, that I showed him a rare smile, “I’m hungry, let’s go back.”
He stared at me, stupeﬁed, and when I couldn’t help but start to frown, he suddenly came up and kissed my face.
The good mood immediately disappeared, I angrily shouted at him, “You!” But after seeing his dazed, clueless expression, I sighed and gave up, “Forget it, let’s go quickly.”
Quickly afterwards, he had dressed me and carried me the same way he had when we arrived.
Psycho’s actions make me go “UwU.” He’s so caring to Han QinYan.
Hi! I’d like to let everyone know that before I had picked up Sect Master and Psycho, Polarbearadise had already started translating chapters 1-4. Unfortunately, their site has been down, but, good news is that their posts had been saved by Endless Yearning Translations . So if anyone is interested in reading Polarbearadise’s chapters, I have linked Endless Yearning Translations’ website. Go check it out!
Polarbearadise’s Chapters 3-4
It wasn’t like I had never wondered about the Psycho’s identity, but he had been crazy for more than just a year or two, and all things that could be used to identify him no longer existed. He was just a wildman now.
But sometimes it was just too boring and lonely in the cave since I had nothing to do, that I will attempt to ask him, but he would not respond.
“Psycho, what’s your name?” “How old are you?”
“Where are the other people?”
“Were you also forced down here too?”
I asked my questions while he laid on my stomach, listening for any movement, not paying any heed to me. Suddenly, my stomach let out a loud rumble. I’m hungry.
He looked at me with a bewildered expression. Embarrassed and ﬂushed, I kicked him to the side with my right foot.
“What are you looking at? Didn’t you hear? Your son is hungry.” After saying that, a wave a shame hit me for taking advantage of him, leaving me feeling annoyed.
The Psycho got up quickly from the kick and foolishly laughed,
“Darling, wait. Will feed you.”
“Good. Good good.” I eagerly nodded my head, “Come back soon.”
The tall man rushed out like a wild ape. About an hour later, the Psycho returned, holding two wild rabbits in his hands, and as a further surprise, he also brought back a barely conscious doe.
It seemed like the doe’s legs had been broken. As the Psycho placed its body on the ground, it struggled to stand up several times, only to fail. In the end, the doe let out a miserable sound.
“What’s happening? Why isn’t it dead?” I asked the Psycho strangely.
Although his face was covered by a thick beard, I could still make out his eager expression when I asked this question.
“It’s for the children to eat…” He squatted by the side of the doe, giving it a scare, and shouted, “Milk!” He pointed at the doe’s four full breasts that were hanging at the stomach, and then stared at me (my stomach) with a tendering loving expression.
What the heck…
I remained speechless for a long time. This Psycho actually prepared a wet nurse for his non-existent son?
He came near me and placed his hand on my chest. Watching his actions, a bad feeling started to form in my gut, and sure enough, my hunch came true as he opened his mouth.
“Darling, no milk.” His tone was full of regret.
This bastard. No wonder recently he has been constantly rubbing my chest and nibbling on the two nubs. On some occasions, he’d nibble till the nubs became swollen, causing me to be unable to wear my clothes in order to prevent it from rubbing against the fabric and causing me more pain. So all that was for me to provide milk?!
Fury poured into my heart as I learned about what happened. If I could move, I would have rushed towards the Psycho and fought him to death.
This one is a man, of course, I wouldn’t have any milk!
However, I couldn’t let out the truth, “Yes, you are right. I don’t have milk. Why don’t you keep this doe to feed your son?”
The Psycho laughed happily and went out to prepare the two dead rabbits, leaving to me and the doe having a stare down. It whined at me pitifully, eyes ﬁlled with fear.
I laughed grimly,” Keep crying, can’t you see we’re both in the same predicament?”
The doe appeared to be quite intelligent. She surveyed me up and down for a moment and stopped crying, turning her head to the sides to like her wounds.
About half a tea break after eating the roasted rabbit, the Psycho came over and picked me up causing my heart to go into a frenzied panic since I knew what was going to take place.
(Half of a tea break: 半盏茶时间, about 10 minutes).
Shrieking, “You wait! Put me down! I can do it myself now. You don’t need to help me anymore… Psycho, did you hear me? STOP!”
Although this kind of thing has been done before, I still have to go through the same embarrassment and have to temporarily bury my dignity and self-worth, and pretend that event has never occurred after it has happened. Only after that, could I unearth my damaged dignity. I don’t know if the Psycho did not want me to go alone or did not believe I could go alone, but he did not stop. With a steady pace, he carried me to a dark corner in the cave. This corner was very far from the entrance, and if one were to smell carefully, they could catch the slightly noticeable, but putrid scent of urine. This is the place where the Psycho goes daily to solve his “major events in life.”
I have heard that beasts, as a sign of defending their territory, liked to leave their marks near their nests. Who knew that people did
that too, and even more unbelievable is that…
The Psycho naturally and easily changed his posture, squatting down, his arms looping around my knees, then proceeded to push down my pants, and pull my legs apart. Just like how one would teach a child how to pee, he held onto my member.
An utter disgrace.
I, a demonic sect leader, was already this old and still need someone’s help to relieve myself!
I trembled in anger just by thinking about that, but the Psycho interpreted as if I really needed to pee, and nudged my face with that extremely prickly beard of his, “Shhhh-”
I trembled even harder, and then… the crisp sound of water was heard. My lower body felt immediately better. My dignity had lost to
a puddle piss.
“Enough, let’s go back…” I told him in a tight voice.
Instead, he shook his head and stayed where he was, “You… two days… didn’t poop.”
“….” “After two incense sticks, the satisﬁed Psycho buried the death of my “dignity” contently in the soil and brought a dispirited looking me towards the brightly lit cave entrance.
(two incense sticks: 两柱香, this time, the incense sticks are 5 minutes, so 10 minutes in total.)
As I laid on the ground, depressed, he began to undress me and kiss my neck. This was the start of the bedtime activity. I felt a strange gaze on me and as I looked around, a pair of large dewy eyes stared back at me, frightening me.
The Psycho noticed my strange behavior and followed my gaze to the doe, and in an instant, the doe was pushed down by a gust of wind. Whatever he did happen so fast that I didn’t even see him move.
Impatiently, he squeezed his member between my legs and grinded, causing my thighs to become really hot.
Sigh, what an immoral beast, not even afraid of getting dirty.
I need to recover soon, recover and escape this inhumane life.
Once I returned to my sect and regrouped, I swear that I will ﬁnd that group of righteous cultivators and force them to experience all my pain and injuries. Then I’ll give them a taste of what it’s like to live through such a humiliating and dignity-destroying life.
After being stuck in this cave for over two months, the weather gradually cooled down, and my broken limbs had ﬁnally healed, though I still couldn’t exert any strength into my arms, with the exception of being able to grasp onto things. But the leg was a whole other story.
Supporting myself on the cave walls, I took two steps. The injuries still emitted a faint painful sensation. If I walked out of the cave in this condition, I’m afraid that I wouldn’t make it far until I’m caught by that Psycho.
I sat down cross legged and stared at the broken leg, sighing. I still have to wait till it’s fully healed. Then I could escape.
Although I can move now, the maniac still does not allow me to leave the cave. If he ﬁnds out that I had snuck out, he would ﬂy into a ﬁt of rage.
–Flashback– (T/N: I added this because it was kind of confusing to ﬁgure out what was happening at ﬁrst.)
“NOT ALLOWED! TO GO OUT!” He kept repeating the phrase over and over again, his eyes glaring at me with blatant anger that spread all the way down to his neck. I’m afraid that he would slam me against the walls if I anger him any more.
As a follower of demonic cultivation, I didn’t have anything to lose, was not afraid of anything, and could adapt to any situation. When he crazily called me his “darling,” I had the guts to kick him and glare at him coldly. But at this moment, when he’s acting like a rabid wolf, I could only meekly obey him. Yet, the situation is still unfavorable. Ignoring my broken limbs, even if I had fully recovered from all my injuries, based on my martial arts level, I still couldn’t defeat him.
I didn’t argue with him, and just laid on my back, turning away from him. I listened to him heavily huﬃng and puﬃng behind me and then he left in a ﬂurry of footsteps, but then returned soon afterwards.
“Darling…” He carefully touched my arm. I ignored him with closed eyes, and pretended to be asleep. He didn’t touch me again, and by listening to the sounds, he had moved to the other side of the cave and went to sleep.
The next morning when I woke up and turned over, my eyes shot open as I was greeted with a wall of blue and green. As my eyes focused, I realized the blue and green thing was actually blue wildﬂowers.
The Psycho is deﬁnitely mad, but he still knows how to woo a woman.
I held the bouquet of ﬂowers but then felt my nose getting a little itchy, which evolved into a big sneeze. With a ﬂick of my wrist, I tossed the ﬂowers behind me and into a wooden fence. The doe inside the fence let out a loud mew and ate the ﬂowers.
After that incident I only walked around inside the cave, never taking a step outside.
Every day when the Psycho heads out to forage for food, I would be left alone, in utter boredom, so I started to amuse myself by talking to the doe. Ever since the doe has been designated as the “wet nurse,” it has been staying in the cave. The doe has gotten fat due to the fact that it has been fed well and had nothing to do but rest, healing up it’s now-healed legs.
“You can adapt better than me, huh.” I fed her a wild fruit. (T/N: He means that the doe had accepted its position as “wet nurse” while he still can’t accept the fact that he has to “give
It chewed on the fruit for a long time, ignoring my presence, and I continued talking to myself, “After a while I am going to leave, but before I do, I’ll let you go. If he has no son for you to feed, you’ll, for sure, be slaughtered for food.”
The doe, seemingly as if she understood my words, stopped eating, and looked up to me, ears trembling.
“Now you’re afraid?”
Suddenly the doe rammed her body on the fence and started to scream in horror.
I stared at the doe dumbfounded by its actions, “You don’t need to be that scared…”
After saying that, I suddenly had a premonition that something bad was going to happen.
I turned around and stared at the cave entrance while grabbing for the nearest weapon I could reach– a wooden stick.
Then, something even worse than what I thought would appear, appeared. A huge behemoth appeared at the entrance. It’s mouth was dripping with saliva, and one of the eyes was blind, giving it a ﬁerce and abnormal appearance. The behemoth was a giant bear.
The heavens want me dead. I could only think about these 5 words (T/N: In Chinese it’s 4 words) as I stared dumbly at the bear.
Quickly I snapped out of my daze and held my breath, carefully moving across from the fence. I thought that since there was a fat deer in the cave, the bear might give up on the idea of attacking me
and go for the doe, thus granting me some additional time to save myself. Unfortunately, I was too naïve: the blind bear was not here for food!
It’s huge body squeezed into the hole, effectively blocking out the light source of the cave, and caused the doe to cry even more. Listening to the doe’s cries, I felt really annoyed.
“Roar” The bear let out a loud roar and ran straight towards me.
I gritted my teeth and clenched onto the stick, ready to ﬁght. Although I was not fully recovered, but at least I could move my hands and feet. If I put up a ﬁght, I might still be able to survive, and if I really couldn’t make it, I could still call for the Psycho to save me.
The moment the bear pounced on me, I caught sight of the the sharp teeth in its mouth as it tried to bite my neck and smelled the putrid scent the mouth was emitting.
I quickly used the stick and jammed it into the mouth, while at the same time trying to mobilize my inner energy, but as I panicked, I couldn’t summon up any qi. My hands were only healed to 60%-70%, and after putting immense pressure on them, they immediately started to shake like a sieve.
As I wrestled with the bear, there was a earth-shattering sound emitted at the cave entrance. Then the weight on my hands lightened, and the bear turned and rushed towards the noise.
I fell onto the ground panting. That was really a life in nine deaths (idiom: narrow escape.) If it weren’t for… I looked towards the cave entrance where Psycho and the bear were already ﬁghting… if it
weren’t for the Psycho coming back in time, I’m afraid that I would had really died here today. To not die when those righteous hypocrites sent me off the cliff, but instead, to die in the mouth of a stupid bear… this way of dying was too stupid. I would had rather died at the cliff.
The Psycho has good skills, but the giant bear wins in the category
of brute force. A bite from that bear will result in broken bones, and to be hit by the bear… it’ll deﬁnitely lead to all the internal organs being shattered.
After watching them for a moment, I soon came to realize that the two already have a long-standing grudge and it wasn’t the ﬁrst time the two had fought. Both were familiar with each others moves and tricks. For now there was no evident winner.
I looked down at the two deep teeth marks indented in the wooden stick I was holding. Just as I was contemplating on whether or not I should help the Psycho out with a sneak attack, I heard a loud cry followed by the sound of a giant collapsing.
I quickly looked over. The bear had been killed, and the Psycho was struggling to climb out from under the bear carcass. Stumbling, he ran towards me. His forehead was dripping with blood from being slashed by the bear’s claws.
At this time, I ﬁnally felt at ease, the stick slipped from my grip and onto the ground, making a “ge” sound.
“It’s ﬁne. I’m all right.” It was also at this moment I realized the real reason of why he didn’t let me head out of the cave. It wasn’t because he was afraid that I’ll run away, but because he was afraid that I might encounter some dangerous being, such as the bear.
He used his bloody ﬁngers to wipe my cheeks and let out a relieved smiled, “My darling is ﬁne. That’s good.”
The sight of his bloody forehead was really not appealing so I ripped a piece of my inner shirt and used it to bandage his wound. “You should be more worried about yourself, you crazy person.”
The Psycho laughed and grabbed my hands, his line of sight moved towards my stomach, “Child. Is good too.”
I felt my smile grow stiff and sighed, “Yes, the child is okay.”
After hearing what I said, he smiled even more.
Deeply sorry for the long hiatus. May was AP season and ﬁnals so I was cramming everything in those weeks. But now school’s over I should be updating more frequently. Again, I’m very sorry for the wait.
“I was adopted by the old demonic sect leader and grew up learning demonic cultivation along with my senior brothers, but all of my brothers were ambitious. They all wanted to be the old leader’s successor and lead the rest of the demonic cultivators to take over Jianghu. But did they really think taking control of Jianghu was that easy? I didn’t have such ambitions. All I wanted was for whoever that succeeded the old master to let me go and allow me to live freely. But who knew, I was the one who became the successor…” I laughed, “They all called me the “ﬁsherman” and the “oriole,” and painted me as a treacherous scum. But I think I’m obviously a “pool ﬁsh.” It’s just that all those power-hungry people got too ambitious and met a bad end.”
Fisherman– When the Sandpiper and the Clam ﬁght each other, it’s the Fisherman who beneﬁts: aid when a third party proﬁts from the struggle of others; neighbors who ﬁght each other will lose out to a
Oriole-The Mantis stalks the Cicada, unaware of the Oriole behind: to pursue a narrow gain while neglecting a greater danger
Basically, everyone’s saying that he just took advantage of his weakened brothers and defeated them when they were powerless.
Pool Fish-A Fire at the City Gates is also a Disaster to the Fish in the Pond: a drastic action may unintentionally affect other people and harm innocent bystanders
He is the innocent bystander in this case, he didn’t want to be the successor, but it still wounded up being him. “I haven’t even been the sect leader for a single year when those stupid righteous martial artists, having nothing better to do, came to annihilate me. I thought, since I had taken up the mantle as the sect leader, then I should do my job well. I couldn’t let out demonic sect’s reputation be destroyed under my leadership, so I rallied my sect and decided to ﬁght back. And who knew, that by retaliating, I almost killed myself.”
I didn’t always have the luxury of time or the empathy to tell others about my past, but I didn’t know how that I ended up spilling everything to the maniac. Perhaps, it was because I knew that he wouldn’t tell it to others. In the past few months, when I had nothing to do, I would just blab about my life story, and in a blink of an eye, I almost ﬁnished retelling my whole life story.
He knew so much about me, but I didn’t even know his name.
“Darling.” The maniac sat at the cave entrance, doing who knows what. From time to time, he would look back at me and give me a brilliant bright smile.
“Psycho.” Since he had called me, I replied back casually. Then I picked up a berry next to me and tossed it in my mouth.
For the past few days all we ate was bear meat, but even with our combined efforts, we couldn’t even ﬁnish half of the bear. So in the end, we could only dig a hole outside of the cave and bury the bear in it. The psycho was worried that since I was “pregnant,” having an all meat diet was probably not good, so he picked a bunch of purple berries, wrapped them in leaves, and brought them back to me.
Originally, I didn’t like to eat the berries, but after a while, I got tired of constantly eating meat, so when I had nothing to do, I would toss one or two berries in my mouth to chew. But since I spent most of my time doing nothing, the big bag of berries was soon emptied. “Darling.” He set down his things and came over towards my side.
I threw the last berry into my mouth, “What are you doing?”
He stared at me for a moment, and licked my mouth, shocking me to the point that I almost unconsciously shoved him away.
“You dog!” I glared at him, wiping my mouth with my sleeve.
The psycho grinned happily and sat next to me, “Darling likes it.
Pick more tomorrow.”
I didn’t respond to him, but after a while, I ﬁnally understood what he meant, and a strange feeling started to bubble in my heart.
Who knows if this maniac had a wife before he went crazy. If he did, she was probably extremely loved and cherished that if she said she wanted the moon, he would no doubt ﬁnd a way to pluck it out of the sky for her.
I pushed away the odd feeling and asked him, “What were you doing?”
The maniac’s eyes lit up and ran towards the cave entrance, gathering up whatever he was doing and showed it to me. It was a spear with a very sharp tip at the end.
“Darling, take it.”
I hesitated, but still took it. It was very light and overall a good self- defense weapon.
“For me? Are you afraid that I’ll be attacked by another bear?” Don’t tell me that this valley was infested with bears.
The psycho shook his head, “No bear.”
He frowned and made a rare serious face, “The day is cold. No food. Dangerous.”
I immediately understood his meaning. The food in the valley was limited, and with the addition of the cold weather meant that it won’t be easy to hunt, thus the beasts that dwelled here would become more dangerous.
But I don’t think I’ll be staying for the winter….
Holding the spear, I hung my head down. After another half a month, I would be able to walk freely. My departure from this place is just around the corner. I just don’t know what would happen to
Psycho after I am gone…
Would he be sad and then forget about me? Or would he go search for me after realizing that I was gone, but after not seeing me for a while, then he’d forget about me? Or would he think about me constantly until he picks up the next soul that had fallen from the cliff and survived and then he’ll forget about my existence?
The last one may be a bit over the top, after all, not everyone is as lucky as me
The last one may be a bit over the top, after all, not everyone is as lucky as me, to be able to survive that fall. But I guess in the end, he’ll end up forgetting about me. He’s deranged to the point that he couldn’t differentiate between a man and a woman, so what are the chances that he could remember me at all.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be careful.” I told him.
Psycho smiled and gave me a quick hug. Then he walked towards the depths of the cave.
I stood there wondering about what he was doing, then he quickly sprinted back, proudly showing me what he was holding.
It looks like… a piece of jade. I took the jade from his hands for another look. On closer inspection, I saw that it was a jet-black piece of jade, somewhat similar to a jade token. It was warm to touch and the delicate engravings showcased its quality and worth. The jade token was the size of half of a small palm. It was engraved with a majestic-looking soaring eagle, and the pair of eyes on the eagle closely resembled Psycho’s eyes.
This probably belonged to the maniac before he came down to this valley, but unfortunately I had spent most of my life in the demonic sect, and can not guess Psycho’s identity off of a jade token.
“This is a good thing, store it away safely, you might need it in the future.” I wanted to give the jade token back to Psycho, but he wouldn’t accept it.
“For you.” He said.
I was about to leave this place, so naturally I couldn’t take his things. Although people curse us demonic cultivators for being evil and lawless, we still have a sense of principle and dignity.
“No, I can’t.” I directly refused.
The maniac insisted, shoving the jade towards me, and I pushed it back.
After a few moments, Psycho anxiously yelled at me, “TAKE IT!”
The more agitated he got, the more he resembles a crazy person, with his unkempt beard and fuming eyes. One of his palms slammed against the wall above my head, causing dust and gravel to rain down on me.
My hands trembled as I held onto the jade, no longer insisting to give it back.
The jade token just hung on my neck, swinging back and forth. When it was time for bed, the maniac had stripped me bare, only leaving the jade token hanging on my neck. I glanced down and was able to see clearly the dark pendant resting right between the two points of my chest. What was black was black, and what was white was white, with two plum blossoms on each side. (当真是黑的黑、白的白，两朵梅花各一边)
I felt the maniac’s breathing turned heavy, blowing on my skin, making it feel numb and itchy.
He licked from the jade pendant all the way down to my belly button, and twirled the tip of his tongue on my navel, causing me to cry out in surprise.
“Ah…. Don’t,” I paused, “Don’t touch my stomach.”
Psycho listened and didn’t lick it anymore, but cautiously kissed my stomach and looked up at me.
“Darling’s stomach, too small, need to … eat more.”
Calculating the time, if I was really pregnant, then I would had reached the three months mark; yet, my stomach was still ﬂat as a board. If I continue like this, he’ll see through my scheme. It’s
impossible for me to not leave.
“Look, my injuries haven’t healed yet. I think all the nutrients were used to heal my arms and legs….” I dodged away from his gentle and caring gaze.
The maniac put his hand on my stomach and laughed foolishly,
Inexplicably, I felt my throat closed up in panic.
Even though I had already been a demonic sect leader for a year, my heart was still not hard enough. I barely mustered a smile, “En, our children.”
Ignoring the fact that this guy had taken advantage of me by stabbing me in the ass without any care in the world, it could be said that he is the only person who had been truly good to me these past years.
The giant bear, I’ve only learned about it after the incident, was actually blinded by Psycho. The bear and human had been ﬁghting for years, over territory, over food, and ﬁnally, for revenge. The bear attacked me thinking that I was Psycho’s person, and by killing me would cause suﬃcient damage to him.
Even bears are so crafty these days.
But alas, the bear is still a bear, and the psycho had skinned it. At ﬁrst I thought he was going to display it in the cave as a trophy, but later I learned that it was prepared for me.
He had been paring the skin for a long time due to the lack of eﬃcient tools. Sometimes when I slept, he would still be sitting by the ﬁre slowly cutting the skin.
Psycho rubbed my head, “Winter cold, padding, warm.”
So it is really for me to use during the winter.
“….Thanks.” I felt the silky thick bearskin. Although there was a foul smell coming from the skin, it can still be considered as a good winter product in this uncivilized environment..
Unfortunately I won’t be able to use it, but Psycho could still use it, so it’s not a waste.
I’ve only been in this isolated valley jungle for a few months, and already had found it unbearable. I really don’t know how the maniac endured this. Perhaps, only crazy people could endure this feeling of isolation and loneliness from being cut off from the world.
Imagine this, the maniac, wrapped in bearskin, sitting alone in the middle of the cave. Outside surrounding the cave is just a plain of snow-white. If he gets hungry, he’ll head out to forage for some wild fruit or animal. If he is lucky, he’ll manage to ﬁll his stomach, if he isn’t then he’ll have to head back to the cave hungry. If I hadn’t fallen down the cliff, then perhaps no one would have known about
Tsk, Han Qing Yan, what are you doing? Just what are you doing?
Do you think you are a living Bodhisattva? Who lives to save other people’s lives? No, you are the leader of a demonic sect. Since he had stayed down in this valley for at least a year, he can stay for longer. He’s also a lunatic who lost his mind, how would he know what loneliness is? You better ﬁnd a way out of here, there are more important things to do. Unless you want this maniac to accompany you to ﬁght those righteous cultivators? If he stayed here, he wouldn’t need to worry about losing his life, but if he goes with you, he’d have to worry about his survival. Who knows if you’ll be able to survive against those righteous cultivators.
“Darling? A warm palm suddenly caressed my face. Shocked, I looked up to see Psycho’s worried eyes.
I pulled my mouth into a tense smile. My brain short-circuited, and I blurted out, “If there is no child, would you still be so good to me?”
The cave was very quiet, and I could even hear my own heartbeat. My body trembled with anxiety. I didn’t know what answer he would give me, but if he would say “no” then at least I could leave a bit less guilty.
For the ﬁrst time in my life I felt so hypocritical, that I was no different than those righteous cultivators. He stared at me for a long time, ﬁnally saying something, which caused my heart to stop.
“Darling, most important.”
I couldn’t tell what I was feeling in my heart at that moment. I felt a bit overwhelmed, a bit sour, a bit hurt… funny … and absurd.
For the time being, regardless of everything else, this sentence was very pleasing to hear..
However, at the thought of the people outside the valley, the thought of all the congregations that were still waiting for me to get back to organize our comeback, this feeling of melancholy was quickly smothered.
He and I are inherently different. If it weren’t for my fall, we would have been complete strangers.
Even if we are sharing an intimate relationship now, doesn’t mean I have to entangle myself with him for the rest of my life.
We both have our own paths, I’ll be my sect leader, and he’ll be his mad self. This is the best ending for us.
But before I leave… I still have to do something.
I wrapped around his neck and hung on him, “Psycho, do you want it?” I said with a suggestive tone, using my knees to gently nudge his lower abdomen.
He clutched my leg, and let out a strangled sound, trying to stay calm, “No, it’ll hurt child.”
I narrowed my eyes thinking that even if you **** me to death, the child will still not be hurt, but on the surface, I added a few words to coax him. “This… It’s been long enough, the child is stable. Just this one night.” I trailed down his neck, and at the same time brought my lips next to his ears, licking it, “Well?”
I seldom show Psycho any affection, let alone take initiative to have sex. Usually if he wasn’t ****-ing me every night, he would be groping me till I screamed at him, now, faced with this much temptation, he quickly pressed me down onto the bearskin.
Underneath me was a path of thick fur, more comfortable than any grass mats. I was crushed by him like a famous woman, and I shouldn’t be happy, but in that moment, I couldn’t help but sigh in relief. (Probably a euphemism for sex, but I don’t know lol 我被他压着像名女子一般承欢)
To do one last “husband and wife” act should be enough to return all his love and care from these days.
He kissed me on the ankle and all the way up to the inner thigh. Now that I recovered, I had no problem doing it in any position, it was up to his preference.
The maniac was very eager, but moved with caution, constantly cradling my stomach. It looks like he still cares about his “child.”
Because my * hadn’t been used for a long time, when he entered my body, there was some slight tingling. He waited for a moment, and once he saw my brow loosened, he started to shallowly thrust into my *.
He was probably afraid of hurting me, since his movements were warm, powerful, yet too controlled, making me a little uncomfortable. I got accustomed to his tempo-like rhythm, which left me with a feeling of panic like hanging in mid air.
“You…. Hurry up … ah …” I curled my toes, my * contiounsingly spasming and twitching.
The maniac held onto my waist to keep me from moving. I twisted my upper body, wanting to get rid of this building pleasure.
Psycho, who probably had held back for too long and couldn’t hold on any longer, bent over and started to suck on one of my nipples. His lower body began to steadily pick up pace on his heavy thrusting.
“Ha!… Aah! Aah!….” It was like a direct hit on my pleasure spot, causing me to be unable to hold on. My ﬁngers dug deep into the fur and my legs were tightly wrapped around Psycho’s wasit, and after a moment, they trembled and slid weakly off.
I fell softly onto the mat, legs still twitching, and for a long time I didn’t make any noise.
Psycho had done it twice that night, and then after brieﬂy cleaning me, fell asleep with me.
The next morning, before it was bright enough, the maniac went out to look for food. I know that he won’t be back for some time, and took the spear and some fruits he had prepared for me, ready to leave.
Before I went, I went to the fence that encased the doe.
“I said I would let you go before I left, but now meat is getting more and more diﬃcult to ﬁnd, letting you go would be a pity.” The doe blinked up at me with big eyes that shone with ignorance, “You should stay. Look at how fat you are, if you were to head out, you would be eaten by other beasts. It’s better to be eaten by Psycho instead.”
I saw that there was no signs of objection and rewarded her with a fruit. Satisﬁed, I patted her butt a few times and got up, leaving without a single glance back. Walking out the entrance, I gazed at the direction where Psycho had left for a moment, and then left in the opposite direction.
It took two whole days of walking for me to ﬁnally make it out of the valley, and it took another two days until I stumbled upon a small village.
Fortunately, when I fell off the cliff, all my belongings stayed with me. I exchanged some copper coins for some grain and a donkey. With better nothing to do, I prepared for the donkey to carry me for the rest of the journey.
Over these past few days, I kept thinking of Psycho, especially in the dead of night before I fell asleep. The jade pendant resting on my chest felt really warm, as if it were directly burning my heart.
At the end of the day, I comforted myself by thinking that I had been with him for over three months and developing some type of feelings over that long period of time was perfectly normal.
I stayed overnight in the small village, planning on getting a night’s rest before heading out on the road the next morning. However, that night I had a dream.
The dream was very clear, as clear as reality. It was as if I was ﬂoating in mid-air, watching in a third person perspective of what had happened in the cave over the three months.
Every moment was replayed, without the slightest difference.
I fell off the cliff, then Psycho saved me, then I had a fever, then he took off my clothes and held me to keep warm. Obviously I was a big man, but he seemed to mistake me for some delicate, unmarried,
young girl; so he decided to take responsibility for seeing my naked
body, and thus I became his “woman.” I didn’t know whether to cry or laugh during the fake pregnancy scene.
When the dream showed the part where I was preparing to leave the cave, I thought that the dream would be over, but no, it kept on going, showing me something that I did not experience.
I saw the maniac. He was carrying a ﬁsh back to the cave happily. There weren’t many ﬁsh in the valley, and it was even harder to catch one in this season, so for him to catch one must have taken a long time.
“Darling!” He shouted at the entrance, as if he were afraid that I didn’t know he was back.
Afterwards he walked in, and I suddenly got a bad feeling that whatever would happen in the next few moments would make me feel terrible. I willed myself to wake up, but I was too late. I ﬂoated above the entrance and watched the psycho running out of the cave, shouting my “name.”
His complexion looked awful as he stood in front of the cave entrance, panting for air, and scanning each direction carefully to catch a glimpse of me.
“Darling, come back!” “Come back Darling!”
He searched for a long time, from dawn to dusk. He climbed whatever that could be climbed-trees, stones, slopes. He went as high as possible for a chance to ﬁnd even a trace of my trail.
He searched for me for two days, not even stopping to eat or sleep; and just when I thought that he, who had boundless amounts of energy, would never give up on looking for me, returned to the cave where we had lived.
His footsteps were unstable. The grass woven shoes had been destroyed due to the days of running around. His feet were covered in mud and countless cuts and wounds.
He ﬁnally seemed to be exhausted. His knees wobbled and gave out, softly collapsing onto the grass in front of the cave. He faced towards the sky and let out an anguished shout, scaring away the nearby birds. When he vented out his grief, one could hear that in his roar contained an endless amount of pain and suffering. After the roar, he unexpectedly collapsed forwards, and with a “pu,” coughed up a mouthful of blood.
Shocked, I struggled to go forward towards his fallen body, but my eyes opened during that moment.
I was awake, but was still in a state of shock and disbelief. My head was ﬁlled with Psycho’s collapsed form.
This dream was so realistic, was it my imagination or did it really happen?
I held onto the black jade pendant on my chest, my mind was still in disorder.
I stayed in this disarrayed state until I had been on the road for about an incense amount of time, and I realized that I had been traveling in the wrong direction.
I told myself, since I had already gone in the wrong direction, it’s better to just go back and check up on the Psycho.
I’ll just go back and take a look. It’ll only take a day or two. If he’s ﬁne, then I’ll leave, the delay won’t really make a difference.
In the end, I was still worried about the maniac. I slapped the donkey to make it go faster. What I didn’t expect was that when I returned to the valley, everything in the cave, including Psycho had disappeared. I found the doe in a bush nearby the cave. I don’t know if she had been used to being kept as a pet, since when she saw me, she didn’t make an effort to hide.
“It seems like he had left you go.” I was dazed for a moment, watching her walk towards me. I quickly waved at it, trying to drive it away, “Go, run away now. You are quite fortunate to survive that calamity, now don’t be stupid enough to be caught again.”
The doe cried at me twice and eventually walked into the woods.
I sighed and waited another day inside the cave, but still Psycho didn’t make an appearance.
I was afraid that something had happened to him and he just collapsed somewhere, so I left the cave and searched everywhere in the valley, but still wasn’t able to ﬁnd him. I feel like I am overlapping with the Psycho from my dreams, both of us searching anxiously for each other.
After another day, I had to accept the fact that the maniac may not be here anymore. I went back to the mountains, and took donkey, who was lazily grazing on the edge of the cliff, and left again.
I have a hunch that after this time, I won’t ever come back.
Although the demon sect is called the demon sect, it still has its own name, which is also a very shabby name at that. It wasn’t rich during its early days earning the name “HanYiJiao”1Poor Sect.
When HanYiJiao was ﬁrst established, the sect’s original intentions were unknown. Still, during my time there, it became clear to me that it was indeed a typical demon sect with a wolf’s ambition of doing all kinds of evil to other people.
I used to think that the demon sect was no different from the righteous sects, but in fact, there are still differences.
It was too naïve of me to actually want to wholeheartedly return to the demon sect in order to help them recover from the entire
situation with the righteous sects. I was just a cheap sect master who had only been in reign for a year. I didn’t have enough prestige, no extraordinary wisdom, and my accomplishments in cultivation were
average. Even my looks were ordinary… the average type that
manifests no evil charm and madness that a demon sect master should possess.
So I wonder, how would an individual like me even be able to convince the sect members?
I had fallen off the cliff with my life and death uncertain; I
should’ve just continued on being a ‘dead man.’ Why did I stubbornly insist on coming back? Now, this only made the new sect master notice my movements and assume that I wanted to usurp his seat, so how could he possibly leave me alone.
That’s right. HanYiJiao had elected a new sect master in the more than three months since I fell off the cliff. The man was not a disciple of the old sect master, but one of the teachers who was also a well- respected and prestigious elder in the sect. Strictly speaking, I should call him shishu2martial/sect uncle.
“You shouldn’t have come back.” My shishu, Lin Yue, is a gentle-looking man in his forties. He was a young teacher of the old sect master and had been serving as a teacher since he reached adulthood. After the old sect master died, he became an elder teacher. In the eyes of others, he is a person who is dedicated to teaching and indifferent to fame and fortune.
I used to think so too, but now, I just want to laugh three times!
“You conspired to take my place as the sect master and now you still want to kill me?” I looked at him coldly. “I am really stupid. I thought that you were a good person, but how can there be a decent person in the demon sect? A good person can’t live as long as you.”
Like an idiot, I wanted to come back to serve as the backbone of the demon sect and lead the sect disciples to kill the next day. Goddamnit! If it were not for my heavy sense of responsibility, I’m afraid I would already be having the time of my life by now.
Tsk, I really don’t ﬁt in the demon sect, this place of deception.
He looked askance at me before indifferently saying, “You are indeed stupid. You are the most stupid among so many children, so I chose you. Your fellow brothers and sisters are too excellent to be the kind of sect master that I want.”
I was stunned. Then it all suddenly dawned on me.
In my days of being a sect master in the past, I often listened to this shishu’s teachings through small and large matters of the sect. He would do whatever he said he would, and I sincerely treated him as an elder. But I did not expect him to think of me as a puppet while I treated him as an elder.
I became extremely furious, to the extent that I didn’t care about whether my internal injuries were completely healed or not. I started attacking him. I knew that he would not let me leave so easily today.
This teacher and I were in the same sect, but he was older and his internal force was much higher than mine. After only ﬁfty or so moves, his palm struck me on my left chest, which instantly made me spit out a mouthful of blood.
I painstakingly returned to HanYiJiao after almost three months, only to be beaten by his strike and get caught in a diﬃcult position once again, ﬂeeing that very night.
It was really as the saying goes, to be so unlucky that even drinking saliva will stuff the gap between your teeth. I was almost recovered, but I was beaten back to my previous injured state, coughing up blood while ﬂeeing from Lin Yue’s pursuit. Yet just as I was about to escape from HanYiJiao’s sphere of inﬂuence, it just so happened that I ran into two righteous path disciples who came to HanYiJiao and were scouting the situation.
I noticed that the sabers on them were familiar, but I wasn’t sure whether it’s because I saw it on one of the cultivators that had surrounded and attacked me on the cliff or not.
I was already an arrow at the end of its ﬂight, and darkness was beginning to cloud my vision. When I saw them, it got even darker and I felt like I was dying. Then I suddenly fainted, falling ﬂat on the ground.
When I came to, I had already been tied up and thrown on a cart.
I pretended I was still unconscious as I eavesdropped on their conversation all the way.
They are disciples of a sect called “Hidden Sword Gate,” and are currently on their journey to attend the Wulin3literally the circle of martial arts cultivators Assembly with their masters. When passing through the demon sect, they wanted to scout the situation in the
periphery of the sect and ask the Alliance Leader for credit when, unexpectedly, they encountered me—a demon sect practitioner who delivered himself to someone’s front door for no purpose at all.
But they only thought that I was a demon sect disciple, and didn’t know my real identity. They don’t know what I did and that the reason I was seriously injured is because I wanted to escape the demon sect.
After a long time, I saw that it would be unlikely for me to continue pretending, and so, I quietly ‘woke up’.
“Master, he’s awake!” shouted one of the disciples in charge of me.
Soon an old man surrounded by a crowd came. He twirled his beard as he asked me, “What’s your name? What’s your relationship with the demon sect?”
“Spare me, gentlemen!” I told them that I was a demon sect disciple. One day, I suddenly woke up wanting to turn my head back
to the shore4A Buddhist term. Repent and be saved; if only one turns
his head, there is the shore. If a person is lost in the bitter sea, as long as he turns his head, he will reach the shore. As long as one repents, there will always be a way back to righteousness., and so planned to apostate. I was then beaten before I escaped far away from the demon sect. I wasn’t expecting to be found but, they all knew what happened afterwards.
Maybe it’s due to the righteous disciples’ their lowly status that even though I spoke deeply, affectionately and with the ability to move people, they were still quite uncertain and skeptical about my words. In the end, they still said that they need to ask the alliance leader to judge me. …Daye5term of respect for older men, isn’t it all over when I meet the alliance leader?
The sect master of the Hidden Sword Gate had poor vision due to old age and did not recognize me, but I had confronted the Wulin Alliance Leader head-to-head only three months ago. Unless he suddenly went mad or became demented, how could he not recognize me?!
I made up my mind to slip away and ﬁnd a chance to escape in the middle of the journey.
Although this Hidden Sword Gate is a small sect, the quality of their disciples’ participation is unlike the level of their sect, especially the two sons of bitches who are speciﬁcally targeting me. As long as these two people guard me, I won’t even have any good fruit to eat.
What’s even more annoying is that although they are a small sect, they have plenty of people they can spare for binding my hands and feet and watching over me all day. The place where the Wulin Assembly would be held was now in sight, but I still hadn’t found a chance to escape.
The Wulin Assembly is a big event, and so gradually, we met more and more people from different sects along the way.
The Hidden Sword Gate members are probably afraid of being robbed by others, so they never revealed my identity, only saying
that I was a thief that they met on the road. I am a former demon sect master but they described me as a thief who steals things… this makes my mood turn rather complicated.
While the party was approaching the town where the Wulin Assembly would be held, I saw some very familiar guys. Fortunately, I wasn’t taking care of my body these past days. I was so ﬁlthy that them being unable to recognize me was just a matter of course. “Brother look, what a beautiful horse!” A disciple of Hidden Sword Gate suddenly exclaimed.
I followed the other party’s line of sight and saw a group of people on horses looking vastly different from the others as they appeared in the town in a very striking gesture.
Each of them was riding lofty black horses, with their smooth manes silkily woven into beautiful braids. With one glance, you can see their difference from the old, rough men around Jianghu. What was even more eye-catching was that when one of the men whistled towards the sky, two mighty goshawks6Northern Goshawk are large
hawks and the largest and bulkiest of the accipiters. They have broad, rounded wings and long tails. –allaboutbirds.org immediately ﬂew down. One steadily stopped on the man’s armguard, and the
other one landed on the shoulder of the man riding in front of him.
“Such beautiful horses and hawks, is it the ‘Black Hawk Castle’?”
“They haven’t appeared in years, how come they’re here this time?”
“Is that Xiao Zhongnan at the front? Didn’t they say he was missing?”
“I know the second one at the lead. It’s Xiao Mobei, the second master of Black Hawk Castle! Then is Xiao Zhongnan really back?”
Amidst the buzzing noises of the surrounding discussion, my eyes
had always stayed on the “Xiao Zhongnan” whose silhouette was gradually drifting away. I had this feeling that… his back seemed very familiar. This familiarity was explained later when Hidden Sword
Gate and Black Hawk Castle stayed in the same inn.
The town where the Wulin Assembly would be held this time was very remote. It took more than a month to go all the way from Partridge Mountain, where HanYiJiao is located, to here. So many martial arts cultivators swarmed into the town at the same time that the town’s few inns were simply crowded, causing more than a dozen people to have to squeeze in at a chalet. There were a dozen people from Hidden Sword Gate, but they still gave some room. I heard Hidden Sword Gate’s disciple whisper to the Black Hawk Castle’s disciples on the side, saying that they have a separate courtyard, but the words “it’s great to be rich” was written on their faces and the way they spoke about it seemed bitter.
After the disciples of Black Hawk Castle cleaned the inn courtyard, the two Castle masters calmly and slowly entered the small inn that didn’t match their identity, while the Hidden Sword Gate was still waiting for the innkeeper to have a vacant room for them.
“Ge, the rooms have been taken care of. Your body has just recovered so you should rest early!”
I was squatting dazedly on the side, bored to death, but after hearing this “Hmn,” my whole being froze in place as if struck by thunder.
I turned my head in disbelief to look at the man who was said to be the master of Black Hawk Castle. The other is very tall, as tall as Psycho. The only difference is that he is dressed neatly and stylishly, without a thick beard covering his face. A heroic ﬁgure who can be regarded as a man among men. However, his eyes that were as deep, quiet, and dark as the night sky, I recognized with just a glance.
— That’s Psycho!
This is indeed a small world full of coincidences.
Psycho seems to have returned to normal, and has returned back to his loved ones. Although I have long known that his identity was not simple, I did not expect it to be this not simple.
Black Hawk Castle’s reputation was something I heard about when I was still in the demon sect. They cannot be said to be natives of Jianghu, and could only count as half. Their paddocks reared the best cavalry horses, they domesticated the most obedient goshawks, and they have been inextricably linked with the court since the time of their ancestors. Because most of their family members are oﬃcials, few people in Jianghu dared to provoke them. After all, no matter how powerful one’s martial arts are, they are still just poor people. This is exactly the reasoning behind the saying, people don’t ﬁght against oﬃcials1The saying “People don’t ﬁght against oﬃcials” equals to poor people don’t ﬁght against rich people.
Hidden Sword Gate and Black Hawk Castle stay in the same inn, so although the treatment is very different and the former could only look up at the latter, it is inevitable for both to cross paths. When
those moments happen, I could only sincerely sigh—power and
money is really a good thing, no wonder so many people like it! At the sight of Black Hawk Castle, Hidden Sword Gate could not help but go up to recognize the other as a father with their dog legs and ﬂattering. However, the people of Black Hawk Castle have strict
discipline; everyone’s eyes would not wander when they
walk2preserve a correct attitude, and most of the time, Hidden Sword Gate would just stick their hot faces on the other’s cold butts.
At night, I was not allowed to stay inside. There is only one room, which was already crowded with more than a dozen people inside. If
they still let me – a stinky prisoner – stay inside, no one would easily be able to sleep. So I sleep in the courtyard, guarded by two disciples of Hidden Sword Gate.
In fact, sleeping in the yard is also very good, very spacious. When you have nothing to do, you could look up at the stars; it gives great aesthetic pleasure. Just… it’s a bit cold.
It didn’t even cross the minds of the Hidden Sword Gate disciples to add a piece of clothing for me. I was still wearing the one I put on in autumn. After more than a month of friction and eluding, I couldn’t see the original color anymore, and it was now so thin, making me shiver.
I couldn’t bear it any longer, so with a thickened face I said, “The two gentlemen, can you…give me a quilt? This location is so cold that I can’t sleep.”
Originally, I didn’t want to ask because my guards for tonight are none other than the two old sons of bitches, but this night was just too cold and my nose is almost frozen into an icicle. If I do not open my mouth until tomorrow, who knows if there will still be someone like me in this world?
“Want a quilt?” The two are wearing thick clothes, sitting by the side and holding tangpozi3a hand warmer while chatting. After my words, they both glanced at each other and then spontaneously showed a strange smile.
I groaned in my heart because I knew I was going to suffer.
Sure enough, one of the sons of bitches walked towards me and stopped in front, he squatted down and asked, “Cold?”
I nodded my head, “Too cold.”
The other party took out the tangpozi from his arms and showed it off in front of me, “Do you want it?” I nodded my head again.
The son of a bitch laughed. I don’t know what he was laughing at.
But then I saw him stretch out a foot, “Lick the shoe clean for grandpa.”
I was stunned. I slowly raised my head, seeing that the other person was smiling like a villain; I had this urge to pierce him with a sword.
At any rate, I was still a former demon sect master, having to
suffer such humiliation under a nameless disciple of some sect in Jianghu is just really, really… outrageous!
“Oh, you’re unwilling?” There was a sudden pain on my face. The disciple might have seen my deﬁant eyes and kicked me to the ground in anger. “Ungrateful!”
My hands and feet were tied. I couldn’t move and also couldn’t get up. I can only lay on the ground in shame and eat a mouthful of mud.
I closed my eyes, “Cease your anger gentleman; this little one is not unwilling. This little one… will lick.”
One who endures humiliation is a true man. Han Qingyan, you were even pregnant before, can just licking a shoe kill you?
Kill me? Of course, it won’t kill me. I understand this fact, but this mouth still can’t go down!
I thought that my dignity had already reached the limit of how low it can be during my time at the cave, but now it seems that Psycho was still too gentle with me.
My ﬁngers were squeezed deep into my palms, my body trembles so slightly. I didn’t understand why I got here. I didn’t want to enter the demon sect, and I didn’t want to be the sect master, so why should everyone treat me like a monkey trainer4To deceive and play people like how a monkey trainer would deceive and play a monkey?!
I can’t do anything about my fate, and the Heavens also doesn’t help me.
Sure enough, only Psycho is sincere to me.
Fortunately, he’s back to normal. He should be able to live a good life in the future and marry a beautiful wife who would actually give him a big fat boy after a year or two. As for my demon self, dust returns to the dust of the earth, where my feet lead me I will go, my life and death have nothing to do with him.
This is also very good, very good…
“Hey! Senior brother look at this, the youngster actually cried! Hahahaha what a soft egg!” The disciple kicked me to the side again, “Disgusting to death, don’t you touch my shoes.”
I lay on the ground, looking at the starry sky with my eyes wet, it seems like I really cried.
I’m a big man; why would I cry? I never cried during my bitter days at the demon sect, and I didn’t cry when I was injured after I fell off the cliff, so why would I cry now…
Forget it, holding back is too stiﬂing. No one here knows who I am anyway, so I’ll cry, just cry.
I lay down for a while, but suddenly, a pot of ice water was thrown on me that had me shooting up from the ground. My ears were ﬁlled with the two sons of bitches’ laughter as I saw that my front was dripping with water and the ground underneath me was now mushier. I suddenly felt like a bald dog, ridiculous and pitiful. “What are you laughing at?” It was the other son of a bitch, the senior brother. The senior brother son of a bitch ﬁnally came over and looked at me while frowning.
I smiled at him. “Righteous cultivators are just like that; they make something up and play dirty tricks on you. Every single one of you…
…are all sons of bitches!” I said, laughing brazenly and unrestrainedly.
The two men probably never thought that they would be humiliated by me like this. After all, I was pretending to be an obedient grandson along the way here. Their faces changed as soon as they heard this, and that junior brother son of a bitch stepped forward and grabbed my collar.
“What did you say? I dare you to say that again!”
I knew that if I said it again, they would certainly hit me. Since I was just waiting for it to happen, I immediately spit a mouthful of saliva on his face instead.
The result is conceivable. I was beaten ﬁercely by the opponent in a rage. I was slapped a dozen times on my face until there was a bloody taste coming from my mouth.
“Brother!” I don’t know why, but that senior brother son of a bitch suddenly stopped his junior brother.
I was violently slammed on the ground, causing the jade pendant on my chest to slip out. I was afraid the two sons of bitches would be greedy and covet this thing, so I struggled to stuff it back into my clothes.
“Castle Master Xiao, Second Castle Master Xiao.” I see the two laugh slightly. “We are disciples of Hidden Sword Gate. This is the little thief we caught on the way. He ridiculed us just now, and us two brothers just wanted to give him a small little lesson…”
The son of a bitch has bent his body in a bow at this time. Wait,
Castle Master Xiao, isn’t that…
“It turned out to be a high disciple of Hidden Sword Gate. I’ve been looking forward to meeting you, I… Ah, Ge wait, don’t go so fast!”
I froze stiﬄy right then. I heard the far sound of footsteps coming nearer, step by step, each sound was like stepping directly on my heart.
The man walked past me at a steady pace. His black sleeves brought with it a breeze, like a net being thrown at me, covering my eyes with darkness.
My hair was still dripping, and the clothes on my upper body were soaking wet. I was shaking, but I couldn’t even tell whether it was because of the cold or because of Psycho.
No, I should be calling him “Castle Master Xiao” now.
Like they heard my heartfelt wishes, the footsteps that had been moving forward suddenly stopped, and stopped right in front of me.
Before I could react, I heard a deep male voice asking me, “Where did your jade pendant come from?”
Of course… you gave it ah.
I grabbed the jade pendant on my chest in reﬂex, not knowing how to answer him for a time. I raised my head and met a pair of familiar yet strange eyes.
The icy coldness in those eyes looks like it wanted to pierce me. I knew at that instant that he no longer remembers me. “I…”
Before I could speak, Second Castle Master Xiao had already caught up. He stared at me for a while and exclaimed, “Ge, isn’t this your Black Hawk jade pendant? You said you forgot where you dropped it, how come it’s… on this person?”
The expression in his eyes made me feel very uncomfortable. It’s almost the same look people at Hidden Sword Gate use to look at me.
“You stole this, didn’t you?” Although he was asking me, I knew that he had already settled with his guess.
I hurried to defend myself, “No, I picked it up! I picked it up on a cliﬀ a few years ago!”
Xiao Mobei paused and looked at Xiao Zhongnan. “Ge?”
The other party did not respond to him. He was still looking at me, as if mentally conﬁrming the authenticity of my words.
I didn’t look away, and also kept looking at him until he couldn’t help opening his mouth. He said, “Since you picked it up, I don’t want you to give it back for nothing. You can let me do one thing in exchange.”
I blinked, when I digested what he said, it suddenly made me laugh.
It seems the Heavens didn’t completely abandon me. I slept, and somehow they managed to send me a present through a broken stone.
I gave Xiao Zhongnan a deep bow that almost knocked my head to the ground. The surface of his shoe was very clean, much cleaner than that son of bitch’s, it won’t be necessary for me to lick it. “Begging Castle Master…to save me.”